Ten Things People Should Remember When They Borrow Books

Well, I have always thought that in the third world, it is normal for neighbors and classmates and lovers and friends to borrow each others' possession such as books. Well, not just books there are also things that aren't spared from this Filipino phenomenon: that include ballpens, petty cash, even intermediate papers (well, that's obviously a collective habit of typical college students). Parasitic as it is, though, people tolerate this . I remember a friend who lent money to a supposed friend, and when pay day comes, that little stafador just went out and could never be found despite all the effort to search for her den. Well, we could never be amazed less of her tactics and invisibility powers.

Anyways, I would focus on the TOP ten things that people should remember when they borrow someone's book.

10. Never ever write comments, highlights, or any visible marks in any of the pages of that book. It's not yours, how are you supposed to explain your liberty of just scribbling down into someone's property? It's pain in the eye to see a myriad of colors under those small prints. Your opinion isn't needed, either. It's vandalism, mate.

9. Don't break the back bone, whatever you call it. It is most embarrassing to see your once well-conditioned book with scoliosis. A broken spine is a disgusting sight.

8. Keep away liquids from that precious book. Just how you care for your precious iPhone or Mac Book, liquids aren't allowed near a book. Do otherwise, and the obvious will happen. You know what I mean.

7. Yeah, remember those times in the library when you just can't stop the urge of tearing a page. Well, those are only applicable to libraries and special journals or wherever you do your crime. You can tear them as much as you want depending on how strong or weak you conscience is, but don't do it to your friend's. He will know it sooner or later, and most likely he's most convinced in pointing an accusing finger to none other than you. Yes, you. How can you supposed to take defense, huh. Silly.

6. Eating while reading is as typical as singing in the shower, but, for the life of you, don't drop a piece of that MnM's. Not only that they make a good sign of your neatness, but they make an impression of your carelessness. Who would love reading Twilight with all the red and yellow and green and greasy spots? Or those cookies your mom just baked for you?

5. Whether dog-earing is acceptable or not, a borrower should never do it to someone else's book. I personally think that folding pages is as acceptable as using a paper clip to bookmark a page. But then, the rule changes when it's not yours. Never do that to someone else's book, it's just too conceited of you to feel free doing absolutely everything to something that is not yours. Rather, using those glossy, Hallmark book marks would be a safe practice.

4. Avoid using your dirty and greasy fingers to flip the pages. To be exactly sure, wipe your hands with tissue or better yet, hit the faucet and use soap. You just can't imagine a friend's reaction when he sees those dirty thumb marks in the white pages. They make semblance, but it's not that that kind of semblance that's good, it's just gross.

3. If you happen to have promised to return the book on Saturday, it is your sole responsibility to do so. Never wait for the lender to send you a pa-cute SMS reminding you that it's one hell of a Sunday already and it's bloody time that the book should have been in his desk already.

2. Misfortune of all misfortunes, you lost the book, please be honest enough to tell the lender it has gone forever. Don't make excuses, they just show how shallow you are. Be adult enough to admit that you have lost it. It doesn't stop there, though. Hit the nearest PowerBook or National Bookstore, and pay the cashier. Nothing can be worse than never replacing the book after all the apologies.

1. And the ultimate cultural mistake of all, sobbing inserted, the execution of the plan: NOT TO RETURN THE BOOK AT ALL. Time after time, the lender reminds the borrower about the book. The borrower promised that it's in good hand, and in time, he will return it. Lo and behold, oblivion seems to swallow that promise. With all the confusion, busyness, and apparent lack of recording who got to borrow what, the book is gone in perpetuity. The devil smiles.